We have all gathered here today to celebrate the eternal union between Salamence and Beasthaxorus, or Beasthaxorus and Salamence as the first party prefers. Long have these two known each other and been deeply bound by the provcative syndrome of love. For too long have they waited to fully embrace this holy matrimony, recently ordained by both Tony Stewart and Sean Connery. As we gather together now to wish this happy couple on their way, we must first conduct the ceremony. The ring has already been presented, the families and friends gathered. May this holy day be blessed as both man and womanly man come together under the eyes of those they cherish.
Do you, Beasthaxorus, take Salamence to be your loftly wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do you part?
And do you, Salamence, take Beasthaxorus to be your loftly wedded husband, to have and to hold, to honor, to treasure, to be at his side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish him always?