So the past month or two have been extremely... interesting. On the more mundane Front, I'm embroiled in a political battle to get the Administrative Position at the Cafeteria. The School's Payroll Lady has the Superintendent's ear and has been working (Using dirty DIRTY tactics mind you) behind the scene's to ensure that her niece gets the position (the last 8 hires at the school have either been members of this person's family or members of her church). My Grandmother has been in the hospital for weeks, had her colon removed and is STILL not out of there yet.

And that brings us to the important subject. The War of the Wills. To Start I'm gonna have to give a brief family tree/breakdown of my Dad's side of the family.

His parent's (my grandparents) are old hillbilly southerners... the kind of people that call the average a=African American male "That Nigraman" Not out of racism or hate but because that's how things used to be done. Good skoal chewin' ignorant salt of the earth. Well They had five Children....

The Five:
Yvonne - the oldest... one of the most wealthy. She's the conniver and feels that it's her right to rule the family.
Anne- basically a miserable old woman that likes to bitch about everything
Jeanette - My cousin Jeff's Mom.... she means well. mildly ignorant sometimes but pretty good people.
Freddie Paul - My Dad. Salt of the Earth... Good Man.
Billy Ray - The baby. He's a grizzled old trucker and now that his wife is dead, he's hookin up with 17-18 year old girls. Not a bad guy. Bit of a temper.

Then there are the Grandchildren... There are Nine of us.

The Nine:

Spawn of Yvonne:
Sharon - Oldest of the Grandchildren, used to think she was alright. Current Events have altered that opinion somewhat. Marries to Dennis (who gets his own special section)
Kim - Still decent people for the most part, even though she's on Team Evil Hasn;t spoken to her sons in years (my cousins Joseph and Jonathon - Good people)
Amy -A bitch. I THINK she holds the record for most marriages but it's close. She's Yvonne's factions pitbull.

Spawn of Anne:
Shon - A Pawn of the others. He's a kleptomaniac and has some real issues. Currently working off to pay a huge debt to stay out of prison. Anne gave him up for the most part when he was little and my Grandparents raised him. In Two of the Wills he gets their house.
Shane - Mostly forgettable and doesn't have much impact in the story. At least so far. His family has currently taken over Anne's house however and she lives in the living room instead of her bedroom. Her clothes are on wires stretched across the room.

Spawn of Jeanette:
Jeff - closest thing I have to a brother. Not Perfect but generally Good People.

Spawn of Freddie Paul:
Qoorl - Loveable caveman. Due to being born at least five years apart from the rest of the Nine I was sort of a black sheep. The Grandparents never had much to do with me.

Spawn of Billy Ray:
Tammy - Pretty decent people. In the running with Amy for most marriages.
Tina - Also decent. Moved away and has nothing to do with most of this tale. Also in the much marriage club.

Special Spousal Mention:
Dennis - Husband of Sharon. Disturbingly friendly and nice to me, but a verifiable psycopath. Kidnapped Tammy when she was around 4, pushed my dad down, pinned his wife to the garage wall with the CAR when she was going to leave him, was almost murdered by Billy Ray. Looks like the old redneck version of a douche.

So that's the little cast of players (not including spouses who do play parts here) Next post I'll get to the meat of the War of the Wills.