Dang this sucks, I got in a fight with my parents(which happens alot).
And my dad wouldn't let me use the computer for no reason whatsoever.
I was really in the mood to do some digital coloring on my artwork.
My mind was overflowing with all kinds ideas. Instead of having fun being creative, my dad forced me to "socialize" with him. It was soooo boring, he was setting up his new Plasma screen TV ignoring me anyways. It was a total waste of time! So I went off and ignored him. I tried drawing but I had artist's block.. I tried reading but I had a huge headache. So since I was REALLY bored, I noticed an apple and tried to make it bounce. It wouldn't bounce so I threw it harder... it whound up exploding and I got in more trouble.(and I honestly thought it would bounce ;__ I was about to clean up the mess, but then my dad said, "You made a mess, now you have to clean the whole kitchen and TV room". I complained about it, and we got into an argument which lead to him smacking me alot with the broom.(I had my arms up to block so he wouldn't hit my face) So, in the end I whound up cleaning the whole stupid TV room and kitchen. ><
After that I asked if I could go digital paint. And of coarse he said no.
I already had my room cleaned, the closed washed, and all my chores done and all that stuff. And, I was the only person who wasn't still in PJ's.
Yet, my dad still wanted to keep me as a prisoner. He claims I'm addicted to it like a drug. I told him it's not the comp I'm addicted too, it's my art!!
I just prefer digital over traditional. He gets mad and claims that being on the computer makes me spend too much time in my room. He said he has nothing against the comp, it's just he doesn't want me in my room. But he had no problem if I was in my on the Nintendo DS! Both ways I'd still be in my room. That made no sense to me. He basically lied. .__.
I would spend less time in my room if I was allowed to excercise. I have a possible risk of heart problems so the doctor says I'm not allowed to excert myself. So, obviously I'll be on the comp. Because nothing else interests me unless it's art related. Finally afterwards he started blaming my comp for my bad grades. I had proof that it wasn't the comp. I've had bad grades before I even knew what a comp was! I think the problem is, I'm just a stupid kid. >>
Of coarse we got into another fight, and I told them that I hate people.
And I hate the family so much! He almost smacked me but I ducked.(which made him angrier) Then I finally left to my room, with a knife.
I intended to commit suicide right then and there.... But then the scary thought of afterlife came into my mind, and I was scared where I'd go if I died. I was just so upset and angry that my parents blame and yell at me for everything. I had to take my anger out on something, so instead I slit my wrists(yes I know "emo"). It actually eased the pain a little. But the thought that I was becoming a cutter was just... I dunno. So I went downstairs to talk with my sister(who I thought I could trust). She begged to see the slits, so I finally showed her. She immediately ran outside and told my parents(that little traitor!). When my parents found out.. they thought I was crazy. They still think that. And my mom called a psycyatrist!(sp? >>) =/
And now I have an appoinment tommarow. I tried to tell my parents I'm not crazy, but they wouldn't believe me! D<
My dad was even gonna take me to a hospital and leave me there.
They claim I'm "Unstable" and "Dangerous". >=/
Basically my parents think of me as this lil guy right here...
What bugs me the most is my sister I thought I could trust became a total ass-kisser to my parents. And my youngest sister is always spoiled rotten!
Even though she has Autism, they shouldn't give her everything she wants. And listen to whatever music she wants, or even eat whatever she wants!
She's even put on alot of weight and doesn't care about anyone but herself. D< This all around sucks! X_x